Sex Tape

You know, just KNOW that the movie isn't going to be good. It isn't word of mouth. It isn't the negative reviews or the generally poor box office showing. You only need to see a trailer and immediately understand that this certain movie is going to be a dud. Today's entry? That's 2014's Sex Tape!

A married couple with two kids, a nice house and good jobs, Annie (Cameron Diaz) and Jay (Jason Segel) have hit a bit of a rut...sexually. Their busy lives don't allow them to have sex much anymore, if at all, both of them exhausted each night. After one particularly disastrous attempt to rekindle things in the bedroom, Annie comes up with an idea. What if they recorded themselves having sex, attempting all the unique positions offered by The Joy of Sex? It works just as they planned...except with one unforeseen consequence. Jay didn't delete the video, their sex tape accidentally uploading to their iPad Cloud. That's not an issue in itself except that Jay has given away a bunch of iPads, and they're all synced up. Now some of their closest friends and families, co-workers and acquaintances are now in possession of Annie and Jay's very intimate sex tape. Can they get all the copies back?

Released this summer, 'Tape' reunites much of the cast and crew from 2011's Bad Teacher. You know what's not so good about that sentence? I thought Bad Teacher was pretty bad to the point it was painful at times. On the other hand, a movie is a movie and a review is a review so I watched it just the same! Director Jake Kasdan works off a script from Segel, Kate Angelo and Nicholas Stoller, Segel and Stoller also writing the two new Muppet movies and Five-Year Engagement. It's odd to consider the fact that a movie about the evolution of amateur sex tapes can...ya know, exist, but it is. From the celebrity pornos that popped up in the 90s to the more technologically advanced iPad videos of the 2010s, here we sit. The odd part? As bad as I thought the movie looked, it had some potential early on.

Go figure. I didn't expect that either. The formula early is tried and true, the married couple who's been together for years looking to spice things up. Yep, it's the stuff of romantic comedies dating back to the birth of romantic comedies. It works in an odd way though, an early flashback showing Annie and Jay's early parts of their relationship when they had sex all the time, everywhere, anyplace and in lots of different positions. It quickly, and I mean quickly, detours once their sex tape gets uploaded unintentionally to the Cloud. The humor was already physical, but it becomes madcap, screwball physical humor that simply tries too hard. Nothing just breathes, just develops on its own. It's like the cast is defying you NOT to laugh. THESE ARE THE MOMENTS YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LAUGH! At one point, Segel's Jay actually runs through a mansion from an angry German shepherd and then swears at him. In the meantime, Annie does some cocaine with her boss. Hilarity!

Much like when they co-starred in Bad Teacher, Diaz and Segel do have some legitimate on-screen chemistry. They're good together. They play off each other well, but that script is just so bad. Unfortunately, they just never had a chance to really make something of the story that honestly/truly/for reals has some potential. Oh, and Jason Segel is very comfortable with male nudity. If curious, we see his butt...a lot, and unfortunately not enough of Cameron Diaz. Also look for Rob Corddry and Ellie Kemper as Robby and Tess, Annie and Jay's best friends, a fellow married couple and potentially in possession of the missing sex tape. Rob Lowe makes an uncomfortable appearance as Annie's potential new boss. His Direct TV commercials are far funnier than the part here, and that ain't a good thing. And in the uncredited surprise cameo appearance, Jack Black shows up late, potentially holding the key to getting the sex tape back.  

What most of my comedy reviews come down to is pretty simple. Did it make me laugh? A stupid story is far from a deal-breaker as long as I laugh, and that's the biggest issue here. I didn't laugh nearly enough. When I did, it was because what I was watching was so unbelievably bad/dumb. Case in point, Jay violently swearing at the passed out German shepherd. Jay falling off a balcony is pretty priceless too. Some of the best moments come late when we do see some of the in-question sex tape. Those are some genuine laughs, but those are in the final minutes of a 94-minute movie. Not a surprising negative review, but just not too good.

Sex Tape (2014): * 1/2/ ****

Muppets Most Wanted

I grew up watching The Muppets, loved them and always have loved them. The Muppet Movie was a childhood favorite and still is, and their TV show that ran for five seasons remains a gem. So naturally I was pretty disappointed when I came away incredibly disappointed with the 2011 franchise reboot, The Muppets. I gave it 2.5 stars but I came away less than pleased. I'm quick to forgive though and here we are with 2014's Muppets Most Wanted.

Having put themselves back on the map.....well, sort of, the Muppets must decide what to do now with their rediscovered fame. Kermit the Frog wants to take it slow, letting the group find their rhythm before jumping back into the limelight. The rest of the Muppets? Miss Piggy, Fozzie the Bear, Gonzo, Rowlf the Dog and the whole crew want to embrace the spotlight. Kermit goes along with it somewhat unwillingly, the Muppets hiring a manager, Dominic Badguy (Ricky Gervais), who unfortunately has some other plans. Badguy is partners with Constantine, the world's most dangerous frog and recently escaped from a Siberian gulag. Their evil, crazy, ridiculous plan? Constantine kidnaps Kermit -- a spot-on lookalike -- and sends him back to the gulag while he takes over the Muppets. Can the gang figure out what's going on or is Kermit doomed to waste away in Siberia?

It wasn't just that 2011's The Muppets wasn't good. It had its moments, and let's be honest. As long as the actual Muppets characters are around, a movie has to be halfway decent, right? Whatever the reasons -- and I'm still processing those reasons -- I liked this version far more. The reviews were about the same, and this follow-up actually made far less money (about $75 million) so go figure. I can't explain it everyone else. For me, I liked the cameos more. The story was goofy but funny. And no disrespect to Jason Segel and Amy Adams and Walter (who's still around), but I never found myself truly interested in their story. Here, I went along for the ride a little bit more. Sure, there are still some flaws that I don't know if any new Muppets movie can fix/solve but those flaws are minimized.

What did director/co-writer James Bobin and writer Nicholas Stoller get right this time around? For starters, more of a focus on the actual Muppets, those created by their founder and brilliant mind Jim Henson. We see Kermit, Miss Piggy, Fozzie, Gonzo, Rowlf, Animal and the whole crew. The voices behind the familiar faces are different, but it's a seamless transition. Walter returns but he's just one of the gang now, not a major focus and that's a good thing. It's fun watching these characters you grew up watching. Their running bits, their sight gags, their subtle one-liners, it's all there. Could there be more focus on our favorite Muppets? Sure, but what's there is getting back to basics.  

If there's an issue, it's the over-reliance on the cameos, the surprise appearances from the Hollywood masses. The key characters include Gervais, nicely cast as the evil sidekick to Constantine, Tina Fey as Nadya, the musically-minded commander of the Siberian gulag, and Modern Family's Ty Burrell as an Interpol agent tracking down Constantine, Sam the Eagle making a memorable appearance as his C.I.A. agent counterpart. They're all solid, all bringing the laughs...but that's just a start. Also look out for -- and take a deep breath --  Lady Gaga, Tony Bennett, Hugh Bonneville, Jemaine Clement, P. Diddy, Rob Corddry, Celine Dion, Zach Galifianakis, Josh Groban, Salma Hayek, Tom Hiddleston, Toby Jones, Frank Langella, Ray Liotta, James McAvoy, Usher, Stanley Tucci, Danny Trejo, Christoph Waltz and probably a bunch others I'm forgetting. Most are a quick scene, a blink and you'll miss it appearance.

And there's the bigger issue. The movie becomes more about the goofiness, kookiness and I hate to say it, the gimmick. It doesn't feel like a movie, just a series of running gags. With this much talent assembled, some of them are going to work. The Muppets' complete acceptance of Constantine as Kermit is pretty hilarious. Animal's immediate awareness of what's going on is perfect. The musical numbers are excellent and far better than the original, especially 'We're Doing a Sequel' and 'I'm Number Two.' It is a movie missing that special something, those magic Muppet moments. It's really good but just not a classic.

Muppets Most Wanted (2014): ***/****

Pain & Gain

There are stories you see on the news, in the newspapers, on the Internet, on the radio, and you just shake your head. There's no way it could possibly be true. It's just too ridiculous to be based in any sorts of reality. That's what I kept thinking while watching 2013's Pain & Gain, a mismarketed film that isn't what it is was made out to be. It's got its positives and negatives with an interesting cast and a generally schizophrenic tone. I think I liked it. Think.

Working as a personal trainer at a Miami gym and fitness club, fitness nut and budding bodybuilder Daniel Lugo (Mark Wahlberg) wants more. He wants to be successful, to have some money, a house with a lawn. He wants the American dream, and he's willing to work for it. There's a problem though. There's just no easy way to do it....until now. One of Daniel's clients, Victor Kershaw (Tony Shalhoub), is a self-made man and a bit of a condescending, arrogant idiot at that with lots of money. Lots of money. Daniel comes up with a plan to not only kidnap Kershaw for a ransom, but have the businessman sign over all of his empire; houses, businesses, money, offshore accounts. Daniel enlists the help of two fellow bodybuilders, Paul (Dwayne Johnson) and Adrian (Anthony Mackie), to pull off the kidnapping/robbery. After several bumbled attempts, the trio does it, capturing Kershaw, but these amateur crooks don't know what they've gotten themselves into.

From director Michael Bay, this is a movie that defies any real description, a straightforward one at least. What defies logic the most is that this....actually....happened. Read more about it HERE with some obvious spoilers. In Miami in 1995, a gang of three bodybuilders actually kidnapped a businessman and held him captive for almost a full month. I don't want to give too much away, but the story takes some surprising twists following the kidnapping that I definitely didn't see coming. 'Gain' has everything including kidnapping, ransoms, blackmail, strippers, drugs, murder, extortion and probably a whole lot of other things I'm forgetting. If I didn't know better, I would have thought this was all made up, the twisted ideas of some warped screenwriters, but no, THIS HAPPENED. Keep that in mind as one bad plan turns into another one here in this bizarrely twisted true story.

Michael Bay has never struggled to cast his flicks, and it's no different here. It's not that the cast is assembled, it's that the script gives them a chance to flex their muscles (pun fully intended). Wahlberg's Daniel Lugo is a very interesting if not at all sympathetic lead character. It's not your typical Wahlberg. He's fiery and over the top and charismatic, desperately wanting something more out of life. It's almost unfathomable the depths of how far he'll go, but that's just another layer in the surreal quality of this flick. I was equally impressed with Johnson as Paul Doyle, an immensely large muscle-bound bodybuilder with quite the checkered past. He balances out his desire to do what God and Jesus wants him to do....with his love of fighting, punching, strippers and snorting cocaine. It's a darkly funny part, especially the surprising friendship he develops with Shalhoub's Kershaw. Mackie rounds out the crew, his Adrian searching and working for the perfect body, falling for a nurse (Rebel Wilson) who helps him with his steroid-induced erectile dysfunction. Quite the trio, ain't it?

Playing the equally shrill, annoying Kershaw to balance out our intrepid heroes, Shalhoub is perfectly whiny as the perpetually shrill, horny motormouth. You can't decide who's dumber as the story develops. Ed Harris plays Ed DuBois, a retired private investigator who gets caught up in the kidnapping, one seemingly decent person amidst all the shenanigans. Also look for Rob Corddry, Ken Jeong, Bar Paly and Michael Rispoli in key supporting parts. 

As a director, Bay has a reputation for flicks that are usually far more style than substance (the Transformers series, Pearl Harbor, Armageddon among others). This 2013 comedy-drama manages to find a balance between the two. There's some hyper-fast editing, a visual look full of color and flash, slow motion galore at times, on-screen messages popping up to introduce people, places and ideas, all that good stuff. Maybe it's because of the frenetic style, but all those different elements worked surprisingly well together. It's not overdone like so many previous Bay ventures. I thought the best stylized element was the narration, all the characters getting a shot at it at different points during the story. It gives the ensemble a good chance to step into the limelight, none of them disappointing.

You really need to know what you're getting into here. The truth behind the film is ridiculously stupid, sinister, idiotic and incredibly dark. Sometimes just within a scene we see all of those elements. It is darkly funny and takes an out of left field turn near the halfway point of the movie. It's easy to see this Michael Bay-directed movie offending a lot of viewers. I take pride in my really awful sense of humor so I was able to go along with things as they developed. I recommend it, but do your research and brace for a movie you really don't like.

Pain & Gain (2013): ***/****

The Way, Way Back

I think we can all agree that growing up just sucks sometimes. The awkwardness of high school, friends, crushes, it all adds up to one big old hellish time in most people's lives. Mine was pristine and perfect so I've got that going for me. Coming of age stories translate well (always have, imagine they always will) to the big screen. This is an early review for a flick scheduled for release later this summer, 2013's The Way, Way Back.

Traveling with his mom, Pam (Toni Collette), and her boyfriend, Trent (Steve Carell), awkward 14-year old Duncan (Liam James) is less than excited about what his summer holds. Trent owns a beach house on the East Coast in a seaside town that always attracts huge summer crowds, and he's invited Pam and Duncan to stay with him and his daughter for an extended visit. Still trying to figure out exactly who he is as a teenager, Duncan doesn't like Trent in the least and struggles to go along with the very social environment all around him. He's quiet, awkward in social situations, but he's a smart kid just the same. One day, an exploring Duncan meets Owen (Sam Rockwell), the slacker but well-meaning owner of a local successful water park. Never one to form a fast friendship, Duncan nonetheless gets along with Owen immediately. Maybe this summer vacation won't be so bad after all.

Coming of age stories deserve a whole genre unto themselves, and that's meant as a good thing. With films like Stand By Me to Almost Famous, Sixteen Candles to The Sandlot and many others, it's a familiar genre. Again, that's a good thing. Directors, co-writers and co-stars Nat Faxon and Jim Rash team up and do it all here, and they do it all really well. I loved this movie. It is that rare movie that is content to be itself. It never tries to be something else. It is quite content being a smart, well-written, well thought out, entertaining, funny, dramatic emotionally effective flick. They filmed along the Massachusetts coast in three different cities, giving the story a realistic backdrop. It's summer vacation, but not quite what we've seen before. Composer Rob Simonsen's score is appropriately low-key, soft and natural with a little bit of quirky indie comedy/emo mindset.

We see this summer through the eyes of 14-year old Duncan, a shy, quiet kid who's still dealing with the effects of his parents' divorce a couple years down the road. Just 16 years old, James does a great job with the part. He gets the teenage angst down without being annoying, and makes a sympathetic character who's believable and actually looks and acts....like a teenager. He especially doesn't like Carell's Trent (much more on that later), wants his mom to stand up for herself, and in the meantime, doesn't plan on spending anymore time with them than he has to. We get to see him opening up to Susanna (AnnaSophia Robb), a pretty girl vacationing next door and similarly from a divorced family. Courtesy of Rockwell's Owen, we see him opening up in general for the better. Kudos to Mr. James though. In an age of 29-year old actors playing teenagers, James shows a knack for making a personable, likable character who you're truly rooting for.

In his summer misadventures, Duncan finds solace at a crappy water park that's a time capsule to the 1980s (with a solid running joke there). He meets adults who he bonds with, finds a community that is welcoming of who he is, encouraging him to be himself while also branching out. I love Rockwell in just about anything he does, and this is one of his best parts. As Owen, he plays the type of friend that every kid should have. Is it a somewhat obvious part? Yes, you're supposed to like him. His motor-mouthed, work-avoiding, always ready with a joke tendencies brings this character to life though. The genuine friendship/dynamic that develops between him and Duncan is pitch perfect, authentic in a way script writers dream of achieving. It's not a father-son, brother-brother relationship, but instead a little of both. Mostly though, they're just friends, and that's all Duncan needs.

The movie runs just 96 minutes (I would have loved a longer version, but as is, it's pretty perfect) and puts all the talents of its very talented ensemble cast on display beyond James and Rockwell. Collette does a good job as Pam, Duncan's mom who's struggling with her own post-divorce life. Carell is an incredible asshole as Trent, Pam's year-long boyfriend who identifies Duncan as a '3' on a scale of 1-to-10. A despicable character, one you hate immediately. Amanda Peet and Rob Corddry play Joan and Kip, a married couple and summer friends' of Trent who are always ready for a party. Allison Janney plays Betty, Trent's over-bearing but generally well-meaning neighbor and Susanna's divorced mom. No filter here with Betty, just brutal honesty with no censor, especially with her son, Peter (River Alexander), and his wandering eye...literally. Also look for Zoe Levin as Trent's dramatic, very-teenage teenage daughter.

And then there's the crew at Water Wizz park that Duncan meets. Beyond Owen, look for Maya Rudolph as Caitlyn, a supervisor who goes up and down with Owen, writer-director-star Faxon as Roddy, Owen's longtime friend, co-worker and expert slide operator (see it, it'll come together), and writer-director-star Rash as Lewis, the germaphobe, mousy shack operator who's always one day away from leaving the job and the park.

The more I think about this movie, the more I like it. I loved the look of it, sunny and sandy. As I mentioned before, the Massachusetts beachfront ends up being an additional character. Anyone who's ever been on vacation in a lake/oceanfront setting has seen little summer towns like this. Loved the music, loved the characters, the humor and the laughs, the drama and the reality of it. I especially liked the ending, everyone ending up right where they should be. This flick doesn't come out until July 5th so you've got a couple months to wait, but it's more than worth that wait. Who wants to go see it with me?

The Way, Way Back (2013): ****/**** 

Seeking a Friend for the End of the World

Everyone has seen Armageddon, right? No? Shame on you. Everyone should see it, but here's the gist. What if Bruce Willis and his motley crew didn't destroy a world-ending asteroid on a collision course with Earth? Those left behind would be limited to a few days of survival before the asteroid ultimately struck the planet. An interesting premise for sure brought to life in 2012's Seeking a Friend for the End of the World.

A 70-mile wide asteroid named Matilda is hurtling toward Earth, and now that a NASA mission (think the one in Armageddon I'd assume) has failed, it is only a matter of time before the asteroid impacts and destroys the planet. Matilda is still several weeks away from impact, leaving the population of Earth a limited time to come to terms with their coming doom. Dodge (Steve Carell) is one of those people, struggling to cope with what's coming, more so when his wife jumps out of their car and runs away. People are looking for answers, for happiness, but Dodge doesn't know what he wants.....and then it clicks. He wants to go find his long lost teenage love and see her once more. Along for the ride is his neighbor, Penny (Kiera Knightley), fresh off a breakup. They hit the road as the asteroid plummets closer and closer.

More than anything else, it was the premise/story that caught my attention here. This isn't one person who knows they're going to die in a set amount of time. This is the entire planet. Everyone. No one is going to survive this world-ending asteroid. How then do you think you would react in that situation? If you knew you only had a few weeks to live -- as does everyone else -- what would you do? Director Lorene Scafaria's film delves into that topic with varying degrees of success. It is neither a comedy or a drama, but instead, it's somewhere in that messy ground in between. My biggest issue is that the tone changes with the wind. One scene, it's trying to be a comedy, but the next scene, here comes the gloom and doom from the drama department.

When it does work, the movie is excellent. There are little snippets in the episodic story that are near perfection. Carell's Dodge goes to a dinner party (seems reasonable, doesn't it?) at the home of his long-time friend (Rob Corddry) and his wife (Connie Britton). Corddry's Warren has adapted a 'Screw 'em all!' mentality, intending to live up his last few weeks. He passes vodka to his kids, encouraging them to chug martinis, jokes that firecrackers are dynamite, but they can't hurt you unless you stand this close. Varieties of hardcore drugs pop up, Patton Oswalt's Roache trying some to check off his bucket list while also trying to get Dodge to get involved in a threesome (or maybe only a two-some...wink). It's these moments that work to perfection. No one is going to react to the end of the world in exactly the same way, and we see a lot of those tendencies. Dodge for one, continues to go to work.

I'll get into the cast more later, but the spotlight is on Carell as Dodge and Knightley as Penny. They're opposites in a lot of ways, but they find a common bond, a link, as the end of the world nears. The story is a quasi-buddy story with a road trip along for the ride so we the coming doom from their eyes. Dodge doesn't see the point in really getting to know someone new because let's face it, they'll all be dead in a few weeks. Penny -- fresh off a breakup with stoner mess-up Adam Brody -- wants to see her family one last time. I like both actors, but I didn't especially care for either character here. Carell seems pegged into this part as a quiet, worrisome guy. It's supposed to be understated, but I wasn't interested. Knightley as the quirky Penny is okay, but she seems to be trying too hard to be quirky, and that's never a good thing. The story starts off at a lightning-pace, funny, smart and dark, but as it progresses (and it's only about 94 minutes without the credits) it loses all the dark humor and is just.....dark.

The episodic story allows for some interesting characters and appearances, none of them around for more than a scene. Corddry especially is a scene-stealer, as is Oswalt in his awkwardness. Along with Britton and Brody, also look for Rob Huebel as Dodge's suicidal co-worker, Tonita Castro as his persistent cleaning lady in a great running bit, Melanie Lynskey as a woman with a crush on Dodge, William Petersen as a helpful truck driver, and Derek Luke as Speck, Penny's ex preparing for the end of the world in military fashion. The best part though goes to Martin Sheen in a quick appearance late as Frank, Dodge's father who he hasn't seen in years. The parts work because they're quick and effective without brow-beating you with a message.

I really liked parts of 'World' and struggled to keep up with the sometimes severely slow pacing in other parts. I loved Mark Moses as a national news broadcaster, providing a face of calm and serenity for viewers as the world is torn apart. We see some react with riots, others in peaceful fashion, embracing what little time they have left. There's no twist or huge surprise in the finale, an ending that works exceptionally well. I just wish more of the movie could have been like that. Still worth a watch, and maybe I'd like it more on a second viewing, but for now it gets a slightly above average review.

Seeking a Friend for the End of the World (2012): ** 1/2 /****