The Sons of Katie Elder

The Sons of Katie Elder
"First, we reunite, then find Ma and Pa's killer...then read some reviews."

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

The Expendables

For several years, the Hollywood rumor mill turned out rumors and reports one after another about an epic action movie meant to be a throwback to the mindless, popcorn entertainment of the 1980s. It was supposed to reunite basically every great action star in a movie that would blow the cast away from every other movie out of the water. No one was going to stop this behemoth, and it would be a modern classic to rival all action movies. So what happened? Names were attached and let go, things change, but by 2010, the movie was finished and released. What movie? The Expendables.

Director and star Sylvester Stallone has been a fan favorite among audiences since he made Rocky Balboa a household name, and criticize him for whatever you want, the man knows what audiences want to see. The Expendables is a prime example, an action-heavy story with cool settings, cooler characters, some impressive hand to hand combat, and in general a sense, an awareness of how cool the whole thing is. So while I liked this movie, I can't help but feel disappointed in some ways.  It is entertaining. It is a lot of fun. But even a couple days later, something was missing that I just can't put my finger on. Still, the action is solid, and the cast impressive no matter how many bigger names dropped out.

After pulling off a successful hostage rescue on the high seas, veteran mercenary and very talented Barney Ross (Stallone) is approached by a shady, mysterious operator, Church (Bruce Willis), with a new proposition for Barney and his team. The mission is dangerous and maybe even suicidal, but the pay-off will be huge. Barney and his team must sneak onto a small South American island and assassinate the brutal dictator who has taken over with his small army.  The odds are impossibly stacked against them as Barney's Expendables will have to take on a small army of soldiers and security. But as they scout out the mission, Barney finds out there's more going on than is being told to them. A former CIA agent (Eric Roberts) is pulling the strings on the island. What have they gotten themselves into? Do they accept the mission, risking almost certain death?

From the first time I heard about this movie a few years back, I was psyched. A men-on-a-mission movie with a cast jam-packed with action stars of the past decades? Count me in. Joining Stallone's team are right-hand man and throwing knife master Lee Christmas (Jason Statham), martial arts expert Yin Yang (Jet Li), rough and ready brawler Toll Road (MMA fighter Randy Couture), and muscle-headed, shotgun-wielding Caesar (Terry Crews). As cool as this group is though, beyond Stallone and Statham, the other three are wasted. They're introduced, disappear, and then reappear at the end for the last suicidal mission. Helping the cause is that Stallone and Statham are perfectly cast alongside each other, throwing one-liners left and right, bitching and moaning like an old married couple. So it's good and bad with the chance for more there.

What's disappointing more than the lack of screen-time for the other three are the actors who weren't cast. Now were these names ever seriously attached to the project? Who knows, but in pre-production when all the rumors were being leaked, names like Chuck Norris, Willis, Steven Seagal, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Arnold Schwarzenegger were all mentioned.  One by one, they seemed to drop out, Willis and the Governator eventually taking small cameo parts. I don't even know how it all would have worked, but I would have loved to see the attempt. It's hard to judge a movie based on what could have been, but this movie was in the news so much, it's nearly impossible not to think of the potential here.

Making this movie, Stallone promised action, action, and more action.  You get it here, and he wasn't kidding. I didn't time this or anything, but I'd wager no more than five minutes goes by in between action sequences.  Gun fights, vicious hand to hand combat, aerial attacks (Statham in badass mode there), car chases, gigantic explosions, The Expendables has it all. My question, and I'll pause here...is it too much action? It's non-stop fun, no question about that. But it gets repetitive. How many times can you see Statham throw a knife into someone's throat/chest? The hand to hand scenes also have a case of Jason Bourne editing, sequences cut so quickly it's hard to keep up. A showdown between quick, agile Li vs. big, brawling Dolph Lundgren should have been epic, but you can barely see what's going on. For the most part, it's all good. But when it's bad, the action trends toward that horrific editing that ruins what you're actually seeing.

I get it. I understand the appeal of those mindless action movies. They're great. No thinking required, just enjoy.  But at 103 minutes (and take away 7 or 8 more for the end credits), the movie is just too short. It feels rushed like Stallone did not know what to do in between action scenes. With this good of a cast, explore the background more of these mercenaries, and hell, even the bad guys. Oh, stereotypical evil, scorned CIA agent gone rogue? Why, what else? How'd this team get together? Even better, some quick scenes explore the mindset of these hired killers. Are they fated to die horrifically in combat? Can anything save them? What drives them to do this, the adrenaline rush, or are they just good at it? I'm not talking a deep, involved look at the mind of a mercenary that sacrifices the action. I'm just looking for a good mix of both, still clocking in at around 2 hours. Is that too much to ask?

Even with all the names mentioned above, that's about half of all the names worth mentioning.  Mickey Rourke is underused but still is a scene-stealer as Tool, a former member of the team and now their contact who hooks them up with assignments. Roberts is Roberts as evil CIA agent, a part he plays to smarmy, slimy perfection. Former wrestler Steve Austin is Roberts' main henchman, looking tough and growling as necessary. Willis and Schwarzenegger are wasted completely, but it's a cool, one-scene appearance. Giselle Itie is the ridiculously gorgeous eye candy, the Expendables' link on the island.

So as I read back over this, I'm seeing how negative this review sounds.  There are flaws here, big flaws you could drive a truck through. But for all my complaints, I can't think of one good reason not to watch this movie. If you like action and some dark humor, you are going to like this movie. Stallone and Statham were the main reasons, but The Expendables is just too fun to pass up. Besides, you don't want to be behind when the rumored sequel comes out in a couple years.

The Expendables <---trailer (2010): ***/****

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