Bad Teacher

Being politically correct is a moving target. What offends some people will probably not offend others. That can make comedies bordering on being politically correct/incorrect very hit-or-miss. What's usually frowned upon? Well, that's a dumb lead-in....lots of things. But one you just don't seem to want to mess with is kids. Kids vs. kids is one thing, but adults making fun of kids? Ouch, and watch out. That's one of the things wrong with 2011's Bad Teacher.

Having taught for a year in middle school in suburban Chicago, Elizabeth Halsey (Cameron Diaz) is bailing on the job and leaving teaching behind....until she gets dumped by her fiance. Coming back from summer break, Elizabeth heads back for another year of forming our nation's youth, or at least her equivalent. She doesn't care in the least, trying to come up with the $10,000 it would take to get breast implants and hook a new sugar daddy. As well, there's a new school teacher, Scott (Justin Timberlake), who she's got her eyes set on, but another teacher, far more chipper and happy, Amy (Lucy Punch), also has the hots for Scott.

I didn't go into this 2011 comedy with particularly high expectations but still managed to come away disappointed. I'm not easily offended so Elizabeth's complete disregard for......well, everything, didn't really bother me. She avoids helping co-workers as well as her students, showing her class a rotation of teaching movies (Stand and Deliver, School Ties, Dangerous Minds) rather than teaching anything. Then, she gets motivation in two ways, finding out that the teacher with the highest test average gets a bonus which she can apply to her implants. Yeah, not an interesting story. Diaz drilling her students with dodgeballs? A little offensive, but at least darkly funny too.

Re-reading that story description, I'd be okay with a story that wasn't involving or interesting if for nothing else it was funny. I mean truly funny. But from director Jake Kasdan, 'Teacher' forgot about the funny angle. It doesn't have to be laugh out loud hysterical every minute. It just has to have some jokes work some of the time, and unfortunately this isn't the case. Diaz is trying to go for the laughs, but the script and increasingly ridiculous story doesn't do her or her co-stars any favors. The story does get more ridiculous right to the very end, turning her into a possibly sympathetic(?) character while Punch's Amy Squirrel gets so stereotypically suspicious and evil it's hard to believe. I chuckled a couple times, but I don't remember any truly funny scenes that would make this memorable.

Starring in 'Teacher,' Diaz is the winner here. For one, she can do extremely dark humor and do it well. She plays it straight with her actions and offensive statements landing with a crash. Two, I don't know if it's her intention as a star/actress, but the whole 99-minute movie seems to scream 'Hey, everyone, I'm Cameron Diaz, and I still look great!' She looks great, so mission accomplished, Miss Diaz. Punch is annoying cliched, Timberlake truly awful in a horribly written part, and Jason Segel a wild card of sorts as Russell, the gym teacher who wants to go out with Elizabeth. He's not good and he's not bad, somewhere in between instead. The Office's Phyllis Smith is a bright spot as Miss Davies, a quiet, soft-spoken teacher who finds an unlikely friend in unfriendly Elizabeth, and the always solid John Michael Huggins has some fun as school principal fighting a losing battle.

Not much else to add. If you like Cameron Diaz as an actress or just think she's gorgeous, you'll no doubt get some enjoyment out of this one. Other than that? Give it a wide berth and steer clear.

Bad Teacher <---trailer (2011): * 1/2 /****

The Boss

And now for those readers who have made it through two reviews of sleazy B-movie Italian crime thrillers, here's a third! Wrapping up director Fernando Di Leo's loosely linked Italian crime trilogy comes 1973's The Boss, the weakest of the three but with enough positive to mildly recommend. Fans of both The Godfather and Scarface should get some enjoyment/entertainment out of it for sure.

Having worked as a trusted enforcer for Don Giuseppe (Claudio Nicastro), a powerful mob boss, stoic Nick Lanzetta (Henry Silva) has been put in a spot with no easy out. With a mob war brewing because of successful hit he pulled off, Lanzetta is caught in the middle. He's loyal to Don Giuseppe, but he also sees more of a chance for advancement if he listens to the big boss in town, Don Corrasco (Richard Conte), Giuseppe's superior. As the bodies continue to pile up, Lanzetta must make a decision. Does he stick with what he knows or try to rise up in the aftermath of the bloody mob war?

Having watched all three of Di Leo's crime trilogy in less than a week, I came away impressed with a couple things. Through all three movies, I was entertained even if there were some sluggish parts (more on that). Mostly though is the downright brutality and cynicism of these worlds. Maybe it's the European audience and market wanting a more reality-based crime story, but everyone....everyone...is a bad guy. It's just shades of bad. When someone gets beaten, it looks, sounds and feels like they're actually getting beaten. Kids, women, pets? Not exempt from some rather graphic deaths. Like I mentioned in The Italian Connection review, Di Leo just don't give a damn. He doesn't care if he offends some. He just wants to entertain a lot of folks and for the most part, accomplishes that.

'Boss' does differ from the previous two movies in the Di Leo trilogy in that it isn't exclusively on the small-scale, low-level hoods. There's a bigger picture here, crime families duking it out for supremacy in the underworld. We hear a lot about 'The Family needs...' and 'The Family must...' when talking about a lot of people making a difficult decision. The Godfather was an obvious influence here -- down to the Conte casting, a role similar to his Barzini -- with 'Boss' hitting theaters just a year after the 1972 American classic. Everyone is betraying everyone, and no one is safe.

A definite bright spot in 1972's The Italian Connection, Silva one-ups himself here. He's the best thing going for 'Boss' by a long shot as Lanzetta, the steely-eyed, ice water in his veins hit man. Silva was a huge presence with a truly intimidating glare when he stared someone down. The hit man is business-like about his job and brutally efficient. To me, it seems like an obvious influence on the Skull, Tony Montana's killer in Scarface. He wears almost exclusively black clothes and rarely shows an ounce of human emotion. He's cold-blooded but highly intelligent and calculating, able to see two or three steps ahead, knowing when trouble will arise. Conte is all right, Gianni Garko is wasted in a supporting part as a police officer on the hunt, Pier Paolo Capponi hams it up as Cocchi, the mob rival, and Marino Mase plays Pignatoro, a former partner of Lanzetta's.

What's disappointing is that for lack of a better description, 'Boss' is boring. If Silva isn't on-screen, the story grinds to a halt. Garko's scenes with his condescending superior (Vittorio Caprioli) serve no purpose and drag on endlessly. Whole scenes are just characters talking back and forth, the camera stationary as if its trying to make us fall asleep. Other times, 'Boss' is just trying too hard, like Giuseppe's daughter (Antonia Santilli) being kidnapped and joining in orgies with her captors just for the movie to have an excuse to have her naked. A nympho hippie? Yeah, right, especially when she jumps into bed for a week with Lanzetta. I liked the movie, but the parts that didn't work truly flopped. Mostly worthwhile for Silva's lead performance.

The Boss <---Opening scene (1973): **/**** 

The Italian Connection

Yes, I'm pretty cool when it comes to watching movies. Because I've got an odd memory for movies I'd like to see, I have an ever-growing list of films (literally, I've written down a list) I stumble across at Netflix, Amazon, IMDB, Turner Classic Movies and on and on. Usually I limit it to harder to find movies that aren't readily available, movies you're glad you find and usually by accident. I stumbled across 1972's The Italian Connection years ago and was finally able to find a halfway decent, watchable copy.

A low-level pimp, Luca Canali (Mario Adorf) has gotten on the bad side of the wrong people. An American mob boss has put a hit contract on the pimp, claiming that he helped steal millions of dollars worth of heroin as it was being shipped. The boss has hired two American hired guns, Dave Catania (Henry Silva) and Frank Webster (Woody Strode), to kill Luca and to do so slowly, painfully and graphically as a message to anyone else doing the same thing. The hired guns head to Italy to hunt Luca, but the pimp isn't even aware he's in trouble. Has someone been setting him up?

This was a movie that was worth the wait in an odd way. Part of director Fernando Di Leo's unofficial Italian crime trilogy, it's gritty, low-brow in most instances and entertaining in almost all instances. There's just something oddly appealing about the forthright nature of these Euro crime movies. They don't seem to care that at some point in the film, they will almost certainly insult or offend someone. Gratuitious violence, random bits of nudity, the definition of politically incorrect, and the best part is that Di Leo and Co. just don't give a damn. Either you like it or you don't. Simple as that. If you do, sit back and enjoy. If not? No skin off the Italian director's back.

One of the same appeals here for me in these Italian/European crime flicks is a similar feeling I have watching spaghetti westerns. When things weren't always going well in the U.S., many American actors -- some past their prime, others rising stars -- headed to Europe for these audience friendly cult favorites. A German-Italian actor, Adorf really seems to relish the part here as Luca, a pimp but gosh darn it! Just an all-around nice guy! All he wants to do is hang out with his daughter and be civil with his ex-wife (Sylva Koscina). Now that wouldn't be an interesting movie to watch, would it? No, not at all, so we've got to piss off Luca and give him a reason to go on a murderous rampage. With a part that could have been too exaggerated (like his part in Caliber 9), Adorf does a good job of keeping the character grounded in some sort of reality. I only knew him through Peckinpah's Major Dundee, but another solid intro to Adorf.

Years ago when I found this movie via IMDB, it was because of the rest of the cast -- no disrespect to Mr. Adorf. Silva and Strode as American hit men taking it to the road? How can you go wrong? Not surprisingly, Silva is the more showy of the duo, a hard-drinking, hard-living, womanizing killer. Strode is just the opposite, all business with no distractions. Moral of the story though, they work well together as a killing duo. In fact, the story suffers when they're not around, and unfortunately through the middle portions, there is a lot of those situations. A whole movie could have been devoted to them, and I'd be cool with that. Also look for Thunderball co-stars Adolfo Celi and Luciana Paluzzi as an Italian mob boss and the hit men's tour guide of sorts.

Building the story, Di Leo seems to revel in lulling you to sleep...to a point at least. The first 45 minutes are painfully slow at times as characters, setting and background fall into place. The last 45 minutes are an adrenaline rush, one crazy action sequence after another piled on top of each other. Watch one of the truly adrenaline-pumping chases HERE, via car and on foot. The finale too lives up to expectations, Luca playing cat and mouse with Dave and Frank in a junkyard. A flawed crime flick, but a good flawed crime flick and highly entertaining.

The Italian Connection <---trailer (1972): ***/****

Caliber 9

The entertaining and originally titled 'Thug City Chronicles' sat in the 'Saved' portion of my Netflix queue for months, and all the while I waited for it to become available. A four-movie collection, I really only wanted to see one of the four -- 1972's The Italian Connection -- but four movies on one disc? Yes, please. I'll give a bunch of Italian crime movies a chance any day of the week. In other words? Expect a wave of those reviews, starting today with 1972's Caliber 9.

Fresh out of prison three years into a much longer sentence thanks to a general pardon, ex-con Ugo Piazza (Gastone Moschin) is looking to go straight and leave his criminal past behind. Too bad for Ugo though because he's immediately approached by former partner, Rocco (Mario Adorf). Apparently Ugo was up to no good before he was sent away, hijacking $300,000 meant for an American drug dealer, but no one was ever able to find out if he did it, and if he did, where he hid it. Everyone wants their hands on the money, especially Rocco's boss, mob kingpin dubbed the Americano (Lionel Stander). Ugo just wants to put it all behind him, and he's got a plan to get out clean.

I grew up watching and continue to watch spaghetti westerns as I can find them. It's a natural jump then to Italian crime movies. Instead of the wild west setting, we get city-scapes full of hired guns, mob bosses, killers, hookers, and anything the criminal underworld can offer. The time is obviously different, but just about everything else is similar. It's a nasty, filthy world where you can be killed for the change in your pocket, and your killer? He won't think twice about it. Writer/director Fernando Di Leo specialized in these movies and knew exactly what the audiences wanted. Watch the opening six minutes HERE, and tell me you're not curious about the rest of the movie. Talk about a real, legit shocker of an opening.

And what would that be exactly? These movies have a distinct look, a shoot from the hip, rogue filmmaker type of feel. A B-movie for the 1970s if that makes sense. The style is part of the appeal from the bad 1970s suits and haircuts to the Italian cities serving as a backdrop. There's a look to the movies that's hard to explain (some of that probably due to the average to below average quality of the DVD). Like the spaghetti westerns, the soundtrack -- here from Luis Bacalov -- is key, an eclectic mix of spaghetti western themed singing, electric guitar, big orchestras and psychedelic 1970s rock. Listen to a very good, very catchy sample HERE. The music and style is aggressive and in your face. So what else do you need?

Those nasty characters, ranging from an anti-hero to the filthiest of villains, and this one's got it all. Moschin is a perfect anti-hero as Ugo, the stoic, nearly silent ex-con who wants nothing more to do with the world he's a part of. He just wants out and to get back with the girlfriend who sort of waited for him, Nelly (Barbara Bouchet), who also happens to be an exotic/belly dancer. Adorf hams it up like nobody's business as Rocco, the possibly psychotic thug who always gets his way. Adorf especially gets a bad dub, hamstringing his character. Stander is oddly menacing with Mario Novelli and Giuseppe Castellano as two of his hired guns working with Rocco. In small but essential supporting parts, Ivo Garrani and Philippe Leroy play Don Vincenzo, a former don now blinded, and Chino, his bodyguard. Lots of particularly nasty characters, and it doesn't end well for most of them in this blood-stained criminal underworld.

The finale especially doesn't disappoint, two major plot points being revealed. The ending is appropriately dark because if nothing else, I've learned European audiences weren't demanding Hollywood happy endings. So with all that said, I can still only give 'Calibre' a slightly above average score. The story drifts too much in the midsection, and thanks to the dubbing, I wasn't always sure what was going on. On top of that, whole scenes with Frank Wolff and Luigi Pistilli's police officers talking about crime and its impact on society are out of place and bring the story to a screeching halt. Still, the positives are there. A good Italian crime flick that could have been great.

Caliber 9 <---trailer (1972): ** 1/2 /****

Take Me Out to the Ball Game

I've made no bones about it that I like westerns, war movies and heist flicks. So brace yourself because here comes a rare review.....a MUSICAL! I know. I'm stunned, shocked and surprised too. If you're going to do a musical though, you might as well do it right. So yes, I watched a musical, but it was a baseball musical at least, 1949's Take Me Out to the Ball Game.

It's the start of the 1908 baseball season and the Sarasota Wolves (you remember them, right?) are the defending world champs...with a problem. The team's star double play combination, second baseman Dennis Ryan (Frank Sinatra) and shortstop Eddie O'Brien (Gene Kelly), are late to report as they close out their offseason vaudeville show (Yes, you read that right). They manage to report on time only to hear some bad news. The club's been purchased and supposedly by a new owner who will try to run the team their way, butting in as unnecessarily needed. Not so fast, Dennis and Eddie, the new owner isn't a 'he' but a 'she,' the beautiful, K.C. Higgins (Esther Williams). Let the musical antics ensue.

Maybe because I don't typically seek out musicals, their inherent goofiness never ceases to amaze me. A 1910s vaudeville act that doubles as the second baseman and shortstop for a championship-winning baseball team? Sure, why not? Now that mild curiosity and confusion aside, there's a stupid, lovable charm to stories like this. They exist in a world where nothing bad ever truly happens. It is goofy and innocent and naive and that makes it all charming. Go figure. I liked a musical. The turn of the century setting doesn't hurt either, adding that old-time baseball quality with bad suits and funny looking baseball jerseys. I stand by my statement though....a baseball musical.

Now I'll probably have to turn my man card in, but the songs and dance numbers were pretty cool here. For one -- and this is going to sound dumb -- the songs and dance numbers have somewhat of a flow to them in terms of being part of the story. Yes, characters burst into song, background performers join in, spontaneously knowing the words and choreographed dancing. Then, the song ends and everyone goes back to normal life. Director Busby Berkeley's name is synonymous with big extravagant musicals with ultra-choreographed dance numbers, and he succeeds on a smaller scale here. The songs are catchy -- especially O'Brien to Ryan to Goldberg -- and they only slightly seem out of place.

The biggest reason I went along with the story and watching the movie was Sinatra and Kelly, two great entertainers who don't disappoint playing off each other. As superstar baseball players, they're less than believable (not surprising) but in terms of chemistry they're great together. Sinatra gets to play the love-struck, bad luck in love Dennis who falls hard for the tom-boyish but gorgeous KC while Kelly plays more of the straight man, the suave and smooth ladies man. Whether they're playing off each other comedically or through their song and dance numbers, it's a perfect match. Kelly especially gets a chance to shine and showcase his ability with several extended dance sequences. Also look for Jules Munshin as Nat Goldberg, the Wolves' first baseman and final piece of the team's double-play trio.

Queen of the MGM musical, Williams more than holds her own with her male co-stars, and ends up being the smartest and most clever of the three. Her on-set experience was apparently less than pleasant -- all-around nice guy Kelly berating her -- but it doesn't show in her part. She has a great chemistry especially with Sinatra. Betty Garrett has a fun part as Shirley, a lovestruck fan who falls for Sinatra's Dennis and won't be easily slowed down. Richard Lane and Tom Dugan are great in supporting parts as Gilhuly and Slappy, the Wolves' no-nonsense manager and his bench coach. Entertaining, charming and without a mean bone in its body, just a good example of a fun story and a time long since gone in Hollywood history.

Take Me Out to the Ball Game <---TCM trailer/clips (1949): ***/****

Breakthrough (1950)

Maybe it's the difference in wars, but with the conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan, movies about those conflicts have almost 100% in theaters. Audiences don't want to see those stories that are so fresh in their minds and memories. Why then after WWII were audiences hit with waves of war movies? Was it just a different war? Did people feel differently? Was it because the United States won? I'm trying to figure it out myself. Released just five years after the war, 1950's Breakthrough is a strong example of what was to come in the war genre.

In England in the spring of 1944, the Allied invasion force is prepping for the coming invasion of France. Among the armies is Lt. Joe Mallory (John Agar), a young, inexperienced officer fresh out of training school. He's been given command of a veteran rifle platoon that's been fighting in North Africa and Italy for two-plus years, with their former commander, Capt. Hale (David Brian), now placed in command of the company. Hale turns to Sgt. Bell (Frank Lovejoy), the similarly veteran soldier, to help Mallory adjust and keep an eye on the platoon. With the coming D-Day invasion, the platoon will have to count on each other if they hope to make it through the campaign alive.   

This straight forward, no frills WWII flick premiered recently on Turner Classic Movies so I took my chance and recorded it, remembering seeing an old VHS box of it years before at a local video store but never picking it up. It isn't a classic, but it is interesting to watch considering how much it foreshadowed what war films would become over the next 10 years. From director Lewis Seiler, it is an early example of a unit picture, a story focusing on a squad, platoon, company, regiment, brigade...you get the idea. Lovejoy's narration is solid without trying to be the end-all, be-all in narration, and the story chooses to focus on the platoon's involvement in the fighting, not the bigger picture of how the war effort is going.

I can't quite put my finger on it, but there was something appealing about this war movie. It doesn't have that whitewashed feeling of so many WWII movies made so close to the end of the war. It's war with one side fighting the other. No bigger picture about why they fought or for who. The Germans are the enemy, but they're not demonized. The Americans are regular troops from all walks of life, individuals forced to work together to help each other survive. It isn't a graphic movie, but it is certainly intense, especially considering its 1950 release, including one battle sequence late. The story follows the 3rd Platoon from spring 1944 to late summer 1944, following them through training, onto Omaha Beach at Normandy, and then through the hedgerows in the French countryside. The formula -- from the episodic story elements to the character archetypes -- would be used countless other times in the years to come, but this is one of the earliest ventures and one of the best.

I'll say again, but 'cliched' isn't necessarily a bad thing. The character archetypes here have been used in countless war movies before and since and will keep on being used as long as there's more war movies. The three lead performances are some of the basics, Brian's Hale the hard-edged commander, Agar's Mallory the newbie trying to learn on the job, and Lovejoy's Bell the veteran soldier who knows how to survive and get his men to do the same. Lovejoy especially represents himself well, having some fun with a familiar character. The platoon includes Cpl. Dominick (William Campbell), the motor-mouth aspiring politician, Rojeck (Paul Picerni), the natural soldier and better complainer, Finley (Greg McClure), the fitness freak, Nelson (Richard Monahan), the wet behind the ears newbie, Henderson (Edward Norris), the family man, Jimbo (Matt Willis), the amiable Southerner, Hansen (Dick Wesson), the jokester, with William Self and Danny Arnold having less visible parts.

Nothing fancy, and nothing that will startle or amaze you, just a good, old-fashioned war story. Solid casting, fast-moving, effective and interesting story, and an honest, forthright look and feel of what it must be to be a soldier. Well worth tracking down a copy if you can find one.

Breakthrough <---short Youtube clip (1950): ***/****

The Muppets

I grew up watching anything Jim Henson got his hands on....okay, maybe not The Dark Crystal or Labyrinth. But Sesame Street? Fraggle Rock? The Muppets? Oh, yes, most definitely. Fraggle Rock's basic weirdness excluded, I loved everything Sesame Street and The Muppets could throw my way from TV shows to feature length movies. So last summer when I saw a new Muppets movie was being made, I was psyched. Enter 2011's The Muppets.

Growing up, young Walter (voice of Peter Linz) has always been a little different, but he's always gotten along best with his brother, Gary (Jason Segel), who's planning a trip to Los Angeles with his girlfriend, Mary (Amy Adams). Gary goes along with hopes of seeing the Muppet Studios, but instead he accidentally hears some startling news. A greedy businessman, Tex Richman (Chris Cooper), has bought the decrepit studio and plans to knock the place down. The only way out? Use a part of Richman's contract against him, but to do so, Walter has to reunite the long since departed Muppets. Can he find them? Naturally he starts at the top, looking for one Kermit the Frog.

It is clear from the script that he co-penned, but Segel was and is a huge fan of the Muppets dating back to The Muppet Show, The Muppet Movie, and yeah, basically anything with Muppets in it. Henson's creations have been out of the limelight for far too long if you ask me so there's a sense of nostalgia just watching this movie. The script actually plays that angle up as the old gang gets back together. Are the Muppets even famous anymore? Will anyone recognize them, much less welcome them back? Segel's script pays tribute to previous Muppet entries -- inside jokes, somewhat edgy humor for puppets, recurring gags -- but never goes overboard. Basically, if you have enjoyed watching the Muppets at any point in your life, something in this story will appeal to you.

While I feel ridiculous criticizing this movie in any sense, the positives outweigh the negatives for the most part. Why's that? Because it's the Muppets, and we get to see the old crew back together! Kermit, Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, the Great Gonzo, Rolf the Dog, Animal, Swedish Chef, Sam the Eagle, Dr. Bunson Hunnydue and Beeker, and any number of other guys I'm forgetting. It's not a long movie so some characters get thrown by the wayside, but what's there for each is prime. Kermit as usual plays straight man to the antics, Miss Piggy loses her mind, and Fozzie is hilarious (as always). There's just a comfort level with seeing these characters again.

Now anyone new to the Muppet franchise should beware of wave after wave of cameo appearances. Cooper is hysterical as maniacally evil Tex Richman, insisting his henchmen laugh maniacally because he can't. Rashida Jones plays a maligned TV executive who puts the Muppets back on TV. Also look for Jack Black in a scene-stealing part as himself, Alan Arkin, Sarah Silverman, Mickey Rooney, Zach Galifianakis, Neil Patrick Harris, John Krasinski, singer Selena Gomez, Whoopi Goldberg, The Big Bang Theory's Jim Parsons, Emily Blunt, Dave Grohl as a replacement Animal, and Ken Jeong. And because Netflix/rental DVDs refuse to include special features on discs, apparently the deleted scenes feature many, many more cameos.

Brace yourself for the sacrilege. I have to criticize a Muppet movie. God bless Jason Segel and his Muppet fandom, but the hamfisted, forced story of his Gary and Adams' Mary is painful to watch. It's got to be hard being upstaged by Muppets, but basically anytime the story left focus from them to the humans....dullsville. It didn't help either that the song and dance numbers are awful. Maybe I'm spoiled with the original The Muppet Movie, but those original songs are classics. The Rainbow Connection does make an appearance here thankfully. As a topper, the new character, Walter, doesn't bring much new to the group. Still, this is a Muppet movie, and with fart shoes! Check it out HERE. The parts that do work -- Fozzie's Muppet cover band, Animal in Anger Management to control his drumming problem, the 'Muppet Man' dupe -- are spot-on. Too bad there couldn't have been more of those moments.

The Muppets <---trailer (2011): ** 1/2 /****

They Came to Rob Las Vegas

In the late 1960s over a span of about three years, Gary Lockwood seemed to be a rising star in Hollywood. So what happened then? By the 1970s, he worked mostly as a guest star on television and B-movies. He's still kicking at 75 years old, but he hasn't been in a feature film since 1998. Whatever the reason, I'm still a fan, and I was glad to see a recent TCM airing of one of those late 1960s movie, 1968's They Came to Rob Las Vegas.

Planning the perfect robbery of an armored car headed for Las Vegas, aging crook Gino (Jean Servais) sees his plan fall apart in execution, and he's killed in the robbery. His nephew, Tony Ferris (Lockwood), is hurt hard by the news because he chose not to take part in the robbery, leaving family out to dry. Knowing what the plan was though, Tony picks up where the previous effort failed, working with a small team of friends and fellow crooks to take down the supposedly impregnable armored trucks of Alex Skorsky (Lee J. Cobb), a businessman trying to get a government contract. What Tony doesn't know though is a dogged insurance investigator, Douglas (Jack Palance), is also on Skorsky's trail, and the three men are on a collision course.

I stumbled across this flick several years back poking around at the IMDB but was never able to track down a copy until this recent airing on Turner Classic Movies. I was intrigued by this heist movie with an above average cast that I'd never even heard of. So why has it been brushed aside all these years? For starters, it is a tad leisurely paced at 124 minutes, countless scenes of the armored truck driving around to the amazingly bad jazz-themed soundtrack. It's hard to describe how bad the soundtrack is, but what's funny is that at other times it is spot-on perfect. Listen to part of it HERE. Even at two-plus hours, the story drifts too much, key background going unexplained, new situations and developments seemingly coming out of left field. And you know what's most surprising? I really liked it.

All bad to lousy things considered, this heist movie with U.S.-Spanish-French-Italian backing is a hell of a lot of fun. Yes, it is fun in that guilty pleasure, so bad it's good department, but the end result is the same. It's fun and entertaining, reeking of that suave, groovy late 1960s style. With backing from so many countries, we've got the feel of a modern spaghetti western -- bad dubbing galore -- with an international cast and Spanish filming locations and then we've got on-location shooting in Las Vegas, a city dripping with sleazy style. Seeing it in 1968? That's just an awesome city. Like the Bond movies or the B-movie Euro crime thrillers, there's just an unexplainable charm and style to 'Las Vegas.' Either you go along with it or you don't, and your take on the movie will probably hinge on that reaction.

What originally drew me in was the heist angle coupled with the casting. Lockwood is a worthwhile anti-hero, quiet and confident as he puts his plan into motion. He also gets the love interest, the very beautiful Elke Sommer as Ann, his girlfriend and inside source at Skorsky's headquarters. Not a great actress, but I don't think she was cast for her acting chops. Cobb and Palance aren't given a ton to do, but they get some points for just being there. Cobb's Skorsky is into the mob for money laundering and generally looks worried/nervous, building up for some large outbursts. Palance is Palance, a high-strung ball of energy just waiting to explode.

As a fan of heist movies and men-on-a-mission movies, I came away disappointed with one aspect of 'Las Vegas' and that's Tony's team of crooks. They include Leroy (Georges Geret), the smooth talking, suave veteran thief, Cooper (Fabrizio Capucci), the young hothead, Sal (Gustavo Re), the machinist with the acetylene torch, Merino (Daniel Martin), the lookout, Clark (Maurizio Arena), the chopper pilot, and Baxter (Enrique Avila), the quiet, assured thief. One quick scene with Tony laying out the plan shows this group has worked together before, but we never hear about it...at all. The team is cool because the story requires it, but when they inevitably turn on each other, it lacks any real punch. Interesting enough, but never developed enough either. A whole movie could have been devoted to Tony's crew.

That said, the heist and the aftermath -- no spoilers here -- are the highlights of the movie. The first 45 minutes are a tad on the slow side, but things pick up with the desert heist; Tony's crew attacking the heavily armored car in the middle of nowhere. The ending doesn't quite pay off like I'd hoped, leaving too much unanswered, but for some reason, I fell for this one. Not a classic and maybe not even that good overall, but worth a watch.

They Came to Rob Las Vegas <---Youtube montage (1968): ***/**** 

Don't Go Near the Water

This is going to sound a little odd when you consider that Glenn Ford was in over 80 movies. I've always been a fan of his, but that was without actually having seen many of his movies. As I check some more off his list, I came to a somewhat surprising revelation. I'm liking him as an actor, movie star and presence more and more. Add 1957's Don't Go Near the Water to the list. And no, this is not a Jaws prequel.

On the small South Pacific island of Tulura, the fighting in WWII seems a long way off. At a small navy base, the Navy Public Relations department is run by the stupidly gung-ho and generally clueless Lt. Commander Nash (Fred Clark), an officer who's never had a sea command, much less been on the water at all. Among his motley crew of officers who would rather be anywhere else is Lt. Max Siegel (Ford), a Harvard grad who does his best to keep his commander in check and his fellow officers from losing their minds. But even out at this remote post in the South Pacific, all sorts of loony characters and odd situations come up, all of them requiring Siegel to work his magic in one way or another.

For all the hard-hitting war movies with a message that were released following WWII, another sub-genre popped up, that of the service comedy. These were stories that focused on the day-to-day life of soldiers across the different branches, leaving the fighting and killing to the darker, more realistic stories. Saying that these movies and TV shows (McHale's Navy, Sergeant Bilko) minimized the war isn't right, and saying a "war comedy" doesn't sound correct at all, but these are fun, enjoyable movies. You look past them as anything profound, checking that sentiment at the door. Sit back and enjoy them, especially this 1957 service comedy from director Charles Walters.

Based off a 1956 novel, I don't think it's fair to say 'Water' has much of a plot. That's not a bad thing though, the easy-going story flowing nicely from vignette to vignette. None linger too long or overstay their welcome, staying around long enough to make an impression and then moving on. Once you figure out the rhythm, hopefully you enjoy the movie as much as I did. Ford's Lt. Siegel is the unifying link among all the subplots, some more interesting than others. The ones that work? One has Ensign Garrett (Earl Holliman) madly in love with a nurse, Lt. Tomlen (Anne Francis), but they can't as much as talk because she's an officer, Siegel intervening as needed. Another has Siegel teaming with Lt. Tyson (Russ Tamblyn) to blackmail a blustering war correspondent (Keenan Wynn, who better?) rather than deal with his daily blowhard complaints.

Maybe because he was steady throughout his career more than a huge breakout star, but Ford never received huge acclaim for his roles. I mostly knew him from his tough guys roles (3:10 to Yuma, The Big Heat among others), but where I've become a fan is in his parts that show off his comedic ability. He usually lets those around him show off while he plays the straight man, but he is sublimely perfect at it, especially here. One vignette has him giving the My Fair Lady treatment to a foul-mouthed soldier (Mickey Shaughnessy), and his facial expressions and physical reactions are worth the price of admission alone. More than just an action star or a comedic presence, he also gets the girl, a Tuluran beauty and schoolteacher named Melora (Gia Scala). Not a great part, but a memorable one, and another positive from the Ford filmography.

With Ford leading the way, the ensemble around him fills in all the holes as needed. What holds it all together is that this group -- no huge names, just recognizable, very capable actors/actresses -- has a ton of chemistry together. I thought Holliman and Tamblyn especially stood out as two young sailors who look to Siegel for help. Wynn is at his blustery best, a condescending know-it-all who plays everyone around him as needed. As the clueless Lt. Commander, Clark is a more obvious funny from his office headquarters. Also look for Eva Gabor as Deborah Aldrich, a war correspondent who causes a stir just by arriving with a low-cut shirt, and Jeff Richards as Lt. Pendleton, the ladies man on the island who Holliman's Garrett has to fight for Francis' Alice. All solid parts that alone don't do much, but together end up carrying the movie.

Not too much analysis needed here. Good, old-fashioned and entertaining WWII service comedy. Well worth seeking out.

Don't Go Near the Water <---TCM trailer (1957): ***/****